Welcome to the Land of Grown Ups – No, You Aren’t That Cool Anymore

So…this past Tuesday night I decided that I was going to go out for a drink after class with my only in-town friend.  Drinks.  On a Tuesday.  Class until 10.  Work at 8 the next morning.  I don't think it went too well.

After two huge glasses of straight vodka laced with ruffies my face was on the floor and my eyes were crossed and I didn’t know my ass from my head.  I’m sure I acted and said a whole lot of ridiculousness.  Fortunately, I had someone there to make sure I stayed within the limits of humanity.  Another fortunately…I don’t remember half of the night.  

I imagine it went something like this.....

I called out “sick” from work yesterday and here I am two days later…the lining of my stomach is gone, my liver is dead, and my head still hasn’t stopped pounding.  I’ve eaten the greatest hangover food ever – a 7 layer bean burrito and chicken quesadilla, a burger with everything on it, Chinese food…I’m well on my way to becoming a fat chick with a drinking problem.  But I did get to experience what I would have been like in college.  All in one night.  It sucked as much as a French whore does.  I’m glad that I’m 32 now.  I’m glad that I don’t go out and get blindingly drunk anymore.  I’m glad that missing memories are less a thing induced by alcohol and more a thing of too much on my plate.  I’m glad I’m not that cool anymore.  Or maybe I’m too cool for that.  Either way, I’m glad to be me here today.  Except for the whole feeling like shit part.  

Lesson learned?  Next time I go out on a Tuesday night I’ll have one cocktail.  One little cocktail, no ruffies.